Raining Blood

an excerpt from my unpublished novel, Gyrl [Parental Advisory: Explicit Lyrics] – circa 2001-2006

Halloween morning. I got my period – evil – which meant I had – evil – cramps, bloating, headache, and back pain. Despite 3 Midol, it didn’t break until 1 PM, but damn it, I was worn out, and what was my costume for the party that night? A white flowy dress. I had convinced Bill to go as Nosferatu and I’d go as Lucy from the ’70’s version of the movie. We’d just watched it a few weeks before, and I told him, to his embarrassment, that Nosferatu turned me on because it reminded me of him. I giggled; he turned bright red. Up through this morning, he swore he was going as something else but he wouldn’t tell me.
       Bill came to pick me up for the party, but I wasn’t dressed. I felt like shit and didn’t want to go, so I told him to go without me. After about an hour of fighting and whining over it, I finally pissed him off enough so he’d leave, after which I collapsed on my bed in a crying fit until nightfall. Once my temper tantrum had passed, I said fuck it, got dressed and drove to the party, which was at a mansion near where Bill lived. I flashed my invitation to the gatekeeper who was dressed as the Grim Reaper and let me pass. Great, now I’m going to Hell, I thought.
       At the door, I gave the secret password to the masked guards in tuxes, having flashbacks to “Eyes Wide Shut,” and walked into the Italianate-Victorian-with-clashing-contemporary-addition house (very not tastefully done, I might add), first into the foyer of the Italianate Victorian portion and handed the butler my coat. I asked where the restroom was and found it upstairs. Checked the dress, made sure all was clean, makeup perfect, and decided that as bloated as I felt, I still kinda looked good in the flowy whiteness, trying to look all innocent and goth at the same time, not really caring at this point if anyone would “get” the costume or not. I left the bathroom and wandered around this old portion of the house, checking out the decor and architecture and art-ness, wishing for a house like this of my own. *sighs* If only houses were still made with such loving-tender-care… 😦
       As I wandered from room to room, I heard some lady gasp and exclaim, “Look, a ghost!”, to which I glanced around and found her glancing around for her friend, so I ducked behind an open door. “Did you see that? She just disappeared! I thought I felt a chill?” I laughed to myself thinking this could be really fun, so I decided to play with people – floating through rooms, disappearing behind doors, hiding behind see-through mirrors (this place was awesome!), and I even stopped and stared at someone until they freaked out and passed the room. Finally, there was a lull in arriving guests, so I decided to follow the signs to the party – in the contemporary portion of the mansion, which was really a large, off-white room with an angled ceiling, an open kitchen area, and more lofted rooms off to the side. The whole place had cheesy Halloween decorations, which surprised me because, in this place, I thought they’d have enough money to go all out. I ate a few hors d’eouvres and drank a goblet of spiked punch. I found the nearest restroom for safe measure. Everyone had wonderful costumes – so creative and well put-together and stuff that you can actually figure out, unlike mine, which, instead of Lucy from the ’70’s Nosferatu film, I was a ghost. I have to say, I was the best decoration/spook in the whole building, just because I really freaked out some people. A part of me wished I’d stayed in that old part of the house – it was more “me”. Plus, no one recognized me at this party anyway. The one person that would have, I couldn’t find.
       I took a seat on the opposite side of the room, in an alcove by the patio doors, then after staking out the patio overlooking the lake, I wandered out there instead. The breeze was strong, so it blew my dress straight out behind me at times. There was supposed to be a cold front moving in with some rain overnight. I walked along the edge of the property, near the retaining wall (I didn’t realize the waves got that big from a lake, but okay). The moon was still shining brightly overhead, on the water, lighting the sky in navy and highlighting the incoming clouds a pale silvery blue. Despite the wind, the night was perfect, a bit on the cool side. I thought, if only I have a lover next to me to share this with, it would be the most romantic of nights. I envisioned a beautiful kiss.
       A few minutes passed, and I heard some people crooning inside the house. Some people should just never get a hold of a microphone – drunk or not, party or not, Halloween or not. No one was nearby out here…no lover to be had… 😦 . So, feeling the call of the wild, or at least the stage, I drifted inside. The lights were turned low with the spotlight on the stage. As I neared it, there was a lull in the “acts” – open mic night at the Hallows, I thought. I didn’t even think about it; I just drifted up onto the stage, with Tori Amos’ cover of Slayer’s Raining Blood” in my head and sat down at the piano just as the light on stage dimmed.
       The song starts off low, quiet and brooding. Some people didn’t even realize I was playing until I began to sing: “Traaaaaaaaapped in purgatory/ A lifeless object aliiiive…” In Tori’s version, the lyrics are drawn out and slow, either invoking sleep or a trance upon the audience while I have to concentrate on breathing correctly to have enough breath to support the long notes. But in this moment, as the light came down white upon me and the house lights dimmed around me, I was completely emersed in the song, lyrically, spiritually, physically. I felt myself bleeding from all parts of my body, bleeding light and blood and sweat under the hot light, breathing so well that I was starting to feel lightheaded, emotionally enraptured by the sounds I was making and feeling as if I could step out of my body and see myself playing. The spotlight was so bright I found my dress glowing, creating an aura around me as I played the blackest of all the songs I knew. The song takes a more sinister turn in the middle, using deeper, louder dynamics, and I spot my Nosferatu in the back of the crowd, his ex-girlfriend beside him. I begin to focus on him.
“Awaiting the hour of reprisal,mmm/Your time slips away/Raining Blooooooooooooooooooooooood!/Raining blooooooooooooooooooooood!/From a lacerated skyyy/Bleeding its horror/
Structure, now I shall/
Reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeiiiiiign In Blood!”
And the notes wind down, dramatic inhale, face pointed to the sky.

-by Karen Marie L.


~ by Karen L. on February 8, 2016.

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